Lord, Give Me Strength

Carolers at Potomac Mills Mall

This morning, like every morning, I go from room to room and gather laundry for that first load of the day.   Then, ever so slowly, I hold on to the banister with my free hand and descend the stairs.  I have to hold on.  My knees hurt.  That's my life.  I don't complain anymore.  I have my good days.  I have my bad.  Then, as luck would have it, I dropped a sock.  I bent down and picked it up.  I can't bend from the knees.  It hurts too much so, I bend...very carefully.  In the process of bending to get the sock, I dropped someone's underwear.  So, I bent down and picked that up.  This went on for a while.  I kept dropping things from my arm load of laundry.  Finally, I just sat down on the stairs, looked to the sky, and said, "Lord, Give me strength."  Once I said it, I had to chuckle.  It was something my Gram-ma used to say when I was a teenager and would come to her home with short shorts or long painted fingernails.  I smiled remembering her.  She drove me nuts sometimes but, one thing was for sure, she was a believer.  We spent every weekend together until I was eleven or so.  My Gram-ma knew her bible and could quote the scriptures better than any television Evangelist she forced me to watch on Sunday mornings.  She even made notes in her bible.  I imagine she made quite a few about me and my unacceptable attire...probably in the sections regarding Sodom and Gomorrah.  She was just waiting for the Lord to turn her Gran-daughter into a pillar of salt or something.  Sometimes I wonder what she would think about me now.  

I managed to make it downstairs.  My knees were still hurting when I stepped on the treadmill but, in time, I made it to my five mile mark.  I followed with my normal routine of push ups, sit ups, butt lifts, and weight repetitions.  I took a quick shower and made myself a whey protein smoothie.  I needed to head over to the mall to pick up some more of my favorite calcium chews.  They only carry them at Vitamin World.  Well,  when I came out of the store, I heard singing.  I walked down the hall a bit towards the music.  There, I saw these kids.  They were all dressed up and singing Christmas carols.  I stood and listened.  I don't know who they were but, they were quite good and before long, a crowd formed.  Ten o'clock on a Friday morning and I was standing there listening to these angels...all because I ran out of calcium chews.  When I thought about it, I had to smile.  I was standing.  I wasn't in bed.  I wasn't in pain.  I was standing there in front of Marshal's with all the other shoppers enjoying the songs of the season.  I felt warm all over.  And my heart...was full.  I decided I didn't want to go home immediately as I had previously intended.  I decided just to walk around and see what else I could I see.  I guess I just wanted to...I don't know...participate, be a part of that seasonal spirit.  In the past few years, I've done most of my shopping on line.  You miss a lot when you shop from home.  You get everything done but, you miss that warm embrace that the holiday provides.  So, I walked.  I walked the halls.  I walked around stores.  I smiled at complete strangers, especially salespeople who looked as if they really didn't want to be there.  I walked until my stomach told me it was time to head home.  I looked down at my pedometer and saw that I'd added another four miles to my day's walking total.  Then I realized something.  The Lord?  He listened.  Come to think of it, he kind of always does.  Its difficult at times, to stand, to take that step, to push myself, to make the right choices.  But there he is...when I least expect it...through a memory or just a familiar song...giving me strength.